The results of an entirely unscientific poll on the best après songs in the world. The playlist is up on Spotify now, for your listening pleasure. And yes, you can argue in the comments about what needs to be added (or removed) immediately.
When it comes to the best après songs of all time, there’s a clear divide between those who can’t get enough of Europop trashiness and, well, everyone else.
Austria’s skiers & snowboarders voted en masse, and dominated the Top Ten with their favourites. And so, the top spot goes to Johnny Däpp – a song so beloved, it doesn’t matter most people haven’t got a clue who sings. It doesn’t even matter that no one knows the words, beyond that glorious, hideous, brilliant earworm of a chorus.
Dapp, Dapp, Dapp, Johnny Dapp Dapp Dapp.
It’ll be in your head for days, and you won’t even mind.
From Mayrhofen to Gastein, Anton to Zell, this absolute banger has been the soundtrack to whole generations of holidaymakers, inadvisably snogging their reps/ski instructors/best mates, falling off tables, and downing Jäger.
Over in France, memories of Val d’Isere’s Cocorico kicking off with Thunderstruck by AC/DC every Tuesday night came in a close second. The slow and steady build up gives you just enough time to get another beer from the bar before long-arming it topless.
In joint third place comes Sweet Caroline & Country Roads. These two tunes are so inseparable in the minds of Söll’s ski veterans, they always have to be played back-to-back.
The Italian revellers went rogue, voting for anything from ‘Freed From Desire’ by Gala (which should be on everyone’s list, especially when the ski boot stamp starts) to ‘Purple Rain’ by Prince, which I’m pretty isn’t an après tune, but only made the list because during the 2019 season, Miravallino’s Wedneday night karaoke was the highlight of the après week.
Save Tonight by Eagle Eyed Cherry got a special mention from Andorra’s skiers & snowboarders, but only ‘if it’s played live in the Irish Bar by that man with his guitar’.
Unfortunately, everyone who’s ever been to Andorra can’t remember any more details than that, because of the tax-free beer and cheap-as-chips shots that make it a favourite winter destination on a budget.
ABBA made the cut, but no one could decide between Gimme Gimme Gimme, Take A Chance On Me or Voulez-Vous, so ‘anything by ABBA’ can take seventh position.
Austria’s skiers & snowboarders tried to have Schatzi Schenk mir ein foto, Mama Laudaaa, Das Fliegerlied & Hey, wir wollen die Eisbaren sehen all in the Top Ten, but as they’re basically the same song with different dance moves, they’re all going together in eighth place.
Regardless of favourite bar, resort or country, everyone agreed on the legendary status of Zombie by The Cranberries.
And fighting for the final spot was Livin’ on a Prayer by Bon Jovi, Don’t Stop Believin’ by Journey, & Roxanne by The Police (have a word with whoever voted for that one).
But after a tough battle, ultimately, Angels by Robbie Williams got our mountain lovers throwing their arms around each other’s shoulders, spilling the last of their beers and promising each other they’d never grow up, never stop skiing & snowboarding, and never stop coming to the mountains together.
This guy remixed it with Hey, Jude. I think whoever he is, he is the true winner of the Battle of the Bangerz.
Follow the Monsguide Ultimate Après Ski playlist on Spotify by clicking here
